Do any of you feel good when you’re stressed? Do you notice how your body responds? Do you notice how exhausting stress can be? So many of us are great at eating well and exercising but many of us are terrible at managing our stress levels. Stress not only ages you, it is significantly detrimental to your health and can also delay pregnancy in women trying to get pregnant. But moreover, it greatly limits our ability to deal with what life throws at us and after some time, even the most basic of challenges can cause us to unravel.
Stress triggers the body’s natural fight-or-flight response and during this reaction, hormones such as cortisol and adrenalin are released. The affect of these hormones is speeding the heart rate and blood flow to major muscle groups (get ready to run!), slowing digestion and diverting energy away from less essential functions. Further, many of the stresses of modern life do not allow us to run or fight! If we’re at work or home, we have to fight against our natural fight-or-flight response and manage enormous stress as a result.
When the initial threat is gone, we should return to our normal / recovery / relaxed states. But this does not happen if we suffer from chronic and ongoing stress. Thinking about deadlines for weeks, worrying about money constantly, worrying about our children… All of these things end up in us feeling stressed without respite.
Chronic stress often leads to physical symptoms but also reduces your emotional resilience when faced with difficulties. Feeling constantly stressed limits your ability to cope with normal day to day stresses. Imagine a stretching elastic band – the more you stretch, the less it can give and eventually it will snap.
What you can do:
Chronic stress can be perpetuated by the belief that being stressed means something is happening / changing, that you are “doing” something. It is also perpetuated by losing sight of your options and black and white thinking. “I must pay this bill tomorrow and I don’t have the money”. “My son is doing badly at school – I am a terrible parent.” “I have no time to do everything I need to do”.
Stress-management requires you to embrace new possibilities and other ways of thinking. “I have been asked to pay this bill tomorrow but I can’t. I’ll contact the company to explain my situation and ask for a 2-week extension.” “My son is doing badly at school. I’ll make some time to go to see his teacher for a meeting and think about ways I/my partner can help at home.” “I will prioritise tasks and see who can help. I will not be so hard on myself. I am doing my best. I will leave what is not important aside.”
Really think about your situation. What is in your hands and what is out of your hands? Are you waiting for a decision or outcome of some-kind? Have you done everything that you can do? How can you delegate tasks? What options do you have? Be creative.
But most importantly, do you best not to enter a vicious cycle of thoughts and emotions that worsen your stress but make absolutely no difference to the reality of your situation.
